Should I continue to be intimate with a suspected cheater?

The ultimate conundrum is when you are faced with the question of whether you should continue to be intimate with a suspected cheater who happens to be your partner. If you have been completely committed to your partner in a relationship you have likely been willing to do things with your body and give up your body in a manner that has made you feel powerful and free.

Now, your mind is similar to that of an object in a washing machine on a spin cycle, racing a mile a minute in a circle not knowing what to do and feeling very, very vulnerable.

You are likely still attracted to your partner but you are wary of being hurt both physically and emotionally. Its possible that you no longer feel like you are the only person who is sharing the body of your partner.

What do you do in this situation? It is a very difficult situation because if you broach the topic about your feelings you will create an argument and might become defined as the insecure attractive individual.

You know if you are not intimate with your partner and do not do anything that indicates a reluctance to be intimate that it will cause irreparable damage to your relationship because it has become an integral part of the relationship. However, at the same time your head is questioning whether can even allow yourself to be intimate with someone who you suspect is cheating on you.


When you are intimate with your partner you are able to be free in the expression of your feelings and if most people are like myself there is no more enjoyable expression than the giving of one’s body. The ability of a person to be emotionally free with their partner and truly enjoy the feel of their body, their hands and even their smell is something that is intoxicating. Yet if you suspect that your partner is cheating you are now going to have a problem expressing yourself in the same manner.

When you are not intimate in the same manner with your partner as you were during previous occasions your partner will understand and recognize it immediately. How can you look at your partner and request that the two of you start using protection when that has not previously been the case? What if you stop being intimate and then find out your partner never cheated? Now you have robbed yourself of intimacy that you truly enjoyed and might never be able to regain it.

If you suspect that your partner is cheating on you its likely that you are unable to truly enjoy being intimate as you did prior to these thoughts of betrayal entering your head. Your emotional state is fragile because you don’t know whether to confront your partner about the situation or to be intimate with your partner as if its your last day on earth.

Physically, you don’t know if your partner has engaged in safe sex outside of your relationship and now you are wary of even kissing.

If you are questioning whether you should be intimate with a suspected cheater than your emotions have already taken control of your brain and body. To fully express yourself intimately with your partner you must be emotionally free and unencumbered which you are definitely not.

You will regain the ability to be intimate without hesitation and absent emotional turmoil only when you have the answer of whether your partner is with you or not.

The giving of your body to an individual is an expression that deserves respect and complete transparency from the other person. If there is any question of whether you are receiving such respect you should put on hold this expression until you get clarification.

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